waiting hurts

we started our adoption process only 4 months ago. 4 months really isn't that long at all but it feels sooo long. maybe because ever since i can remember, i have wanted to adopt. i long to meet our precious one from uganda. i can't wait to hold him/her and see our sweet son with his new brother/sister. my heart aches whenever i think about how long it is going to be until we actually meet our son or daughter.

it is not only the waiting to hold/meet/kiss/hug/cuddle him/her that hurts. it is knowing that in the waiting, our precious child will have to endure something that no one should ever have to endure. we do not know why our child will be placed for adoption. we may never know the tragic events that put him or her in an orphanage. and that breaks my heart. it breaks my heart that his or her momma and/or daddy will have to come to the conclusion (maybe they already have) that they can no longer care for their sweet one. as a mom, i can't imagine how hard it would be to come to the reality that i couldn't care for my son anymore due to poverty, disease, famine.... no mother or father should ever have to make that choice. it breaks my heart to think of the things that his/her family may have endured because they are my family. my family through christ, through adoption, through love.